I am at home on a friday night..... sigh...

Today.... well let's just say.....busy?? It started out ok. Woke up at 6, went for a jog/walk for an hour, saw a raccoon on the way, not skunk. Applied for 10 different places for work. Tried to watch tutorials on adobe AE software without falling asleep.... yeah... trying to be productive! Trying to do something... It was a lovely day to go out... hike... mac mall... but NOoooo I am a nerd on the computer.

Then it was.... Play day at the house with running, screaming, whining, more screaming, crying kids of 6 for 2-3 hours. yeah... I shut my door and wished I had a lock on it.
I do love kids, just not 6 of them at the same time. I think I still have ringing in my ear from them..

Got a lot done. Finally figure out the animation conversion. My friend Pt and I were chatting online for good hours on the subject from animation to world views, politics, life, meaningful songs, movies, culture,rock bands, and the kind of band we would like to make. We even talked about the old posters of the band BTN ska. It was nice to have someone who actually gets me and understands me because most of the time people only see the outer exterior side of the character I portray so they say things like "you're so weird" or "you're so funny" to me. And if I start to discuss about the deep thoughts I have people start to distance themselves from me. So hey! what luck huh? I do have friends all over the world but they are not near me physically like the time difference is so different...
so it was nice to have a chat w/Pt today. I wish I could talk/chat like that with another... I was a little envious that he had an awesome bi-cultured k-wife who taught him all the new possibilities of life than to think single mindedly like this country we live in. I hope to find someone I could do the same, and really intuitively be connected with. Yes, a MAN would be preferably nice.

There was a lyric phrase he liked that really describes both of what we perceive/want our lives to be it went something like
"I don't want to be just a branch of the tree
I just want to learn how to grow my own seed"

Which one do you think you are? the branch or the seeker?

Friday.... oh yes Friday... usually a single woman on a Friday would go out...
NOT ME!!!!
TONIGHT! I happened to be the ULTIMATE AUNTIE M to the rescue!! At 5 I was helping making dinna. By 6 I was feeding my niece and nephew and little Maya some rice, sausages, teriyaki chicken, carrot, celery, tomatoes, radishes. Then played with the kids in the yard chasing and running and more screaming til' Maya's papa... oh today mama came... It was all worth it I guess because while dinna time Maya said, "I love you, Auntie M". AWWWWWWWWwwwwww my heart melted...but my heart ached for her at the same time...uh...m.........sigh..

While my sista went out to a nice restaurant in HB with her girlfriends I watched videos of insanely precise snipers with my bro in law and a little bit of supernatural reality show... creepy....

So here I am writing a blog on how pathetic I am on a friday night 9PM NO DATING, NO GOING OUT, just a bottle of smirnoff ice with me while I type... ok I'm out of ice need to get some more....sigh...

BUT A DAMN GOOD AUNTIE I MUST SAY!
It DON'T matter... she said I love you Auntie M.... that's all that matters right?!